Journaling is so tedious for me. Why can't I just be normal and scrawl my thoughts down. And what for? For someone to stumble upon and read one day? Try and figure out the things that go on in this fucked up little head of mine? Im terrified to let him in. What would he do? If I cracked open my shell, opened wide, let him take a look inside? Th anger, hurt, betrayal.. the fear? But of what exactly? I don't think in this case its abandonment. I'm not as scared of him leaving as I am of him staying. Not living up to his potential, not having as good as he deserves.
Pregnant girls are damaged goods, haven't you heard
2 comments:
What do you write to someone who you've never met but feel like you know? I read all your posts, on every blog. Its been at least two years, more likely three, since you posted a comment on my first blog, and how we have changed since then. I know that my opinion means little to nothing to you, but I'm proud of you. You're a much stronger person than I am. A much stronger person than most people gave you credit for. Your story scares the hell out of me, and I guess it does for you too, but keep your head up, you can do it. In response to a post about your insecurities, and why Brendan hasn't left, all i can provide is my own view. The moment when my girlfriend is most beautiful is the moment after crying, the moment when she wakes up with terrible breathe and messy hair, the moment when she is surprised. The moments when the people that don't know, wouldn't want to be there, they are why we stay. I guess that is love. He is just as terrified of not living up to your expectations as you are of not meeting his. In my view, the reason you are together is because you deserve each other.
I apologise for the familiarity of my comment, and the length. Please keep writing because the difference you make matters, even if you don't know about it.
Yeah, you've made a difference in my life too. I don't know why, but you inspire me SO much, Sophia. :)
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