Not worth the truth.

I'm a little too overwhelmed to be trying to blog right now,

but I'm going to try.

I'm tired of being lied to, and I don't know how to stop it.

I ignore all the little lies,

Act like they're not there,

Pretend like I believe him.

Picking my battles, right?

At some point though,

I just have to wonder

Why the fuck I'm not worth telling the truth to.

Why you have to lie, and hide,

And have a story and excuse for every little thing in life.

I'm tired of sitting back,

And letting it happen.

I've never been a pushover like this,'

I've never put up with bullshit in the relationships.

When did I stop standing up for myself?

When did my standards just dissipate?

Oh yeah, when I got pregnant.

I'm fighting tooth and nail to create a happy family to

Raise this baby.

I can't have a broken family,

I can't have a broken home.

I need stability,

And I need a million times more for this baby,

More than Brenden or I ever had.

But at some point I have to realize that if

This baby has a mommy and daddy that don't love each other,

It's going to be even worse than just having a mommy.

I need a vacation, and I need to clear my head.

It's going to be a long and lonely week.

I just want my baby.

I want to hold it, and just know that this was all worth it.

Because right now..

I don't even know.

Everything is falling apart.