What you said and what you did.

I wish you could've meant what you said.
I lost alot more than a "boyfriend figure."
That's not the part that keeps me awake at night,
and has me second glancing through every truck window at stoplights.
I lost my friend.
I lost the security, the comfort.
I went through and deleted your thousands of texts, finally.
Only two are left.
Why, I have no idea.
But they made me wonder.
The first one, is from December 22nd.
It read;

"It's difficult to explain. In a way, I wish I could hang out with you and help out with things. I know it sucks trying to do things on your own, and I want to see you happy. You deserve alot more than you give yourself credit for, and I want you to realize it. You think I'm a good person, but I want to be a better person because of you. I know that we both have rough lives but we shouldn't have to deal with it alone. I want to be a constant in your life, something you can depend on 24 hours day. I want to be the one thing you can count on for anything. I just want your life to be better than it is because you are so much better than this life. You deservev happiness, and I want to help you find it."

And the second text?
This one:

"Honestly..."

Yes, that message was full of honesty. All the honesty you had promised me in the first place. I'm not posting it, because it's too much work to change names and dates and situations so that I don't get myself in trouble. What you did was wrong. But I suppose when you think about it, I went right back and let you be an awful person all over again. But that's beside the point. That first message.. just reminds me that no matter what they say, who they seem to be, how nice they are in the beginning.. everyone can hurt you. And everyone, I mean anyone, will.